FROM THE BOOTH · UPDATED EVERY TUESDAY

POWER RANKINGS · WEEK 4

Computed cold from the 2026 season as it happens: record, all-play strength, and points scored, re-ranked after every week's games. Arrows measure movement from last week. The blurbs are the booth's. The math has no feelings; the booth compensates.

1▲1
Karim
(I LaPorted the Nabers) · 3-1 · 585.9 PF · Certified Fraud

Karim sits first at 3-1. Every other manager is officially playing for second until further notice.

2▲1
Aziz
(To Infinity and Bijan) · 3-1 · 580.2 PF · The Coward

Up to 2. detonating 182.6 on Mustafa will do that. Sustainability sold separately.

3▼2
Mustafa
(Waiver Sniper) · 3-1 · 520.7 PF · Cellar Dweller

Mustafa drops to 3 following getting buried by Aziz, 182.6-98.6. The booth is not angry, just thoroughly unsurprised.

4▲2
Omar H.
(The Milkman) · 3-1 · 498.7 PF · The Milkman

Omar rises to 4 on the strength of handling Omar 101.7-87.9. Enjoy the altitude; the air is thin and the schedule is patient.

5▲3
Ahmad
(Raventus) · 2-2 · 531.6 PF · Bench Warmer General

Ahmad climbs to 5 after handling Adil 163.5-137.9. The booth remains suspicious, but the scoreboard is the scoreboard.

6▼1
Adil
(Talkin Tua Teenager) · 3-1 · 477.2 PF · Free Fall

Falls to 6 after dropping one to Ahmad, 163.5-137.9. Somewhere, a bench player scored more.

7—
Yousef
(Black Ts) · 2-2 · 498.2 PF · The Fraud King

No movement at 7. handling Zaid 110.4-104.7 changed nothing, including the booth's opinion.

8▼4
Omar A.
(CRASHEE RICE) · 2-2 · 484.3 PF · Asleep at the Wheel

Down to 8. dropping one to Omar, 101.7-87.9 is the kind of thing that gets a film session scheduled.

9—
Issa
(Shamjesus) · 2-2 · 442.2 PF · The Skid

Issa holds at 9 after handling Okashah 140.6-113.3. Steady. Boring. Fine.

10—
Okashah
(Mohammad's Dolphins Team) · 1-3 · 406.9 PF · Waiver Bridesmaid

Okashah holds at 10 after dropping one to Issa, 140.6-113.3. Steady. Boring. Fine.

11—
Zaid
(Palestony Soprano) · 0-4 · 402.5 PF · Target Practice

Zaid stays put at 11. dropping one to Yousef, 110.4-104.7, and the needle declined to move.

12—
Tarick
(Shia Killer) · 0-4 · 367.6 PF · The Hater

Tarick anchors the basement at 0-4. The white t-shirt does not care about your projections.

Rankings recompute automatically every Tuesday morning after the week finalizes. The formula: 45% record, 35% all-play, 20% points scored. Complaints about the formula are complaints about your roster.